Joe's visit

“What do you feed him?”, asked Joe, our very handy landlord. Joe had come down to our house to remedy my failed attempt at replacing our kitchen sink's drain. The one it had didn't have a basket to trap food waste, so I purchased one in town thinking it would be easy as stepping in cow poop. And looking back now, it really was easy. I just had no clue.
But anyway, Joe inquired about Wasabi's (my sister's dog) diet. The prompt for his question was as follows. Joe sat cross legged below our kitchen sink. He wore the same type of checkered button shirt he wears daily. At around six feet tall, and with his commanding no-bullshit style of communication, Joe looked extra large finagling under our sink. I sat next to him, paying close attention to his every move in case I had to fix our sink sometime in the future. Kate was up on a tall ladder, applying her painting skills to the transformation of our house walls. Kaia sat on the couch, and Wasabi, well Wasabi was tied to a chair so he could let Joe work in peace. The thing about Wasabi—or one thing at least—is that when he gets upset, he gets gassy. For those of you who have never owned a dog, a dog fart can only be compared to a bad hangover fart. So amid his little barks and complaints, Wasabi was letting out very loud, human-like sounding farts. With his first one, I just giggled quietly, and didn't say anything. As they kept getting louder and more frequent, however, I felt it was important to say something so Joe wouldn't think we were lousy hosts.
“Damn Wasabi”, I said. “He farts a lot when he's anxious.” “Really?” Phhhhhtttttttt!!! “What do you feed him?”. Fortunately for me, I was next to Joe, and it was obvious that the farts were coming from farther away. So either Joe believed us, or else he thinks that Kate is one gassy painter. In the end, the sink got fixed, Kate did a beautiful job on our living room walls, and Wasabi, well Wasabi is as Wasabi does.

P.S. Wasabi eats two big cups of dry dog food per day. In the mornings, he gets a bit of gross wet dog food. Furthermore, at every chance he gets he snacks on grass and on the occasional cow droppings.